


Do You Even Know What “Netflix & Chill” Means?

by yerbamansa



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: Dogs, Fluff, M/M, Netflix and Chill, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-01
Updated: 2018-12-01
Packaged: 2019-09-05 06:15:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 653
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16805086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yerbamansa/pseuds/yerbamansa
Summary: David and Patrick settle in for the night and can’t decide on what to watch.





	Do You Even Know What “Netflix & Chill” Means?

“What the fuck is _Fake or Fortune_?” David has control of the remote and stops to read the description. “They ‘use investigative skills and scientific techniques to determine if paintings are real or just impressive forgeries.’ Oooh, I might be good at this game...”

“David, come on.”

“ _Fine_.”

“Look, there’s something called _Dogs_. That sounds… nice?”

David shrugs and puts it on. After an opening sequence focused on a sick young woman but no dogs, he clicks out. “I thought there would be more dogs in that.”

“You like dogs?”

“I mean, sure, I’m not Alexis.”

Patrick smiles. Alexis around Ted’s foster dogs is kind of a hilarious clusterfuck. “Did I ever tell you about the dog I had growing up?”

“You did not!”

“It was a beagle named Buddy. Yeah, dad’s a big Willie Nelson fan.”

“Sounds cute.” David imagines a wholesome young Patrick playing fetch with his best furry friend. “We never really had a pet.”

“No? Not even a little guy that you can carry around in a handbag?”

“Listen, just because you’ve seen the Kardashians do it, doesn’t mean every rich person did it. We weren’t all riding their fucking trendy coattails.”

“I wouldn’t dream of implying any such thing.”

“Besides, mom has been wary of animals ever since an incident where a monkey tried to snatch her wig on a beach in Thailand, so…”

“Not sure I see the connection, but all right.”

“Do you miss having a dog?” David is genuinely curious.

“Sometimes. Why?”

“Dunno. Is it weird that sometimes I look at the pictures of shelter dogs that Ted puts on his website?”

“Not at all. Not at all! They’re cute!”

“Oh, my _god_ , they are _so_ cute.”

Patrick is surprised to hear this admission. It makes him smile softly. “Would you want to get one?”

“I don’t know anything about having a dog.” David looks anxious, so Patrick leans in and kisses him.

“You can learn, if it’s something you want.” David grins and kisses him back.

“Maybe.” He turns back to the TV and points the remote with purpose.

_Click. Click. Click._ “Oh, _House of Cards…_ ”

“Fuck Kevin Spacey.”

“Right.”

“Ahhhh! _Carol_!”

“David. No. We’ve already watched it twice.”

“No, _you’ve_ watched it twice; I’ve seen it five times.”

Patrick stares at him with a face that reads, _David. Seriously_.

“Fiiiine. What about _Set It Up_?”

“You’re not going to guilt me into watching a romantic comedy tonight.”

“But Lucy Liu—!”

“Nope.”

“What about _Julie & Julia_ if we fast forward through the non-Julia Child parts?”

“That seems like a lot of effort.”

“Also I feel like Amy Adams was overly criticized just because she’s _not_ Meryl.”

“That’s not why.”

“If you say so.”

David scrolls right past _Sherlock_ without stopping. Patrick doesn’t say a word.

“Hey, hold on, _The Office_! I love that show.”

Now it’s David’s turn to shoot Patrick an _are you kidding me_ look.

“What? It’s funny!”

“No.”

“How about _Stranger Things_? My brother was raving about it.”

“Is that the one with the kids and a monster?”

“I think Winona Ryder is in it, too.”

“That doesn’t help, if we’re being honest.”

Patrick rolls his eyes and wonders if they’re just going to scroll aimlessly all evening. “Hoookay. Oh, what about that— _The Great British Baking Show_? Isn’t there a new season up?”

“YES. YES. THAT.” David clicks in and selects the first episode of the latest season. “It’s a good thing you made such a filling dinner, because this is liable to make me _very_ hungry.”

Without looking away from the screen, Patrick points toward the kitchen. “Jocelyn gave me some Nanaimo bars for helping out with a tax thing.”

“Well, thank you, Jocelyn,” David says, cuddling up to Patrick and setting down the remote. “Oooh, it’s Cake Week.”

“I’ll just be making notes on what to bake for your birthday.”

David smiles contentedly and gives Patrick a squeeze.

**Author's Note:**

> Welp. It's a thing. Writing makes me feel OK so I put it out into the world for the 2-3 people who might find it cute. *shrug* Catch me on tumblr @yerbamansa.


End file.
